What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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Your momma's so fat that she contracted type 2 diabetes and died at a young age because obesity is a huge problem in America.

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Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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Why did the boy get coal in his stalking. Cause he wants to be a geologist and that's what he asked for.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Stevie Wonder valentine: Roses are black, Violets are black, everything is black, I cant see shit!

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How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

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What happens when you stick your hand down the jelly bean jar? The black one steals your watch.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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Whats fuzzy and pink? A pink fuzz ball

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

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A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

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Stop making fun of Stevie Wonder, you dont seen what he has.

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

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XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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