We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

How many republicans does it take to raise the debt ceiling? Technically, none, as the president has the right to do this based on the 14th amendment.

Why did 5 members of the Al-Qaeda walk into the bank? To make 5 seperate cash withdrawals

why was the black kid made fun of at school? Because he was a nerdy boy who drinks tea

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

what is the differrence between a boy and girl their oranges

In Soviet Russia, Joseph Stalin killed a lot of people and there was nothing funny about it.

Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

What do you call a bunch of white people walking down a cliff? Avalanche

Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

how did the man jump over the mountain? it was a small mountain and he had a trampoline

why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

charlie sheen becomes sober.

What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

Whats slower than molasses? A dead baby.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...