a black person was walking into his home. good thing balls like apple juice and Miley Cyrus was keeping guard with her sword.

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

Despite their parents wishes, two teenagers under the age of 18 tried multiplying. Their answer was 27.

What did the rat say to the dog? Nothing, he is a rat and therefore incapable of speech.

a man walks into a bad part of town he is shot 13 times and dies.

An old asian woman is driving down the freeway a drunk driver merges into her lane. Everyone is ok because she keeps a safe distance behind.

Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

Why was Jacob not allowed to play sports? He fell down in the middle off the street and got ran over 50 times and could never do anything again.

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

What's the dumbest animal in the rainforest? A polar bear.

Q: Whats horny and likes your leg? A: My dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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