Why'd the Squirrel fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead

Stevie Wonders said to his friend, "Have you seen my house?" "No" "Neither have I"

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

What is 33 + 1? Penis

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

What's worse than 9/11? FaZe Banks' upload times

How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

What looks like poo but is rainbow colored? Rainbow colored poo.

Pigachu is a Porkemon.

What's the best way to anger a Muslim? Key his car in front of him.

Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

Knock Knock. Who's there? (knocker runs for life).

What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

What has 4 legs and doesn't move? A child born in Chernobyl.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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