Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

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A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

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Why did the man trip over the kitten? He was blind.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

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******************************************************** Okay, so there were two muffins in the oven. One muffin said, "Oh my gosh! We're gonna die!" The other muffin said, "Whoa a talking muffin!" **********************************************************

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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I did it. the Bulls fan Took a few hours on Microsoft word. then I copy and pasted it on this!

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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What did the hobo get for christmas? Nothing.

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Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

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how did the blonde get a concussion? she didnt see the pole in front of her.

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What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops