Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

SHUT UP, yes you... WHAT DID I JUST SAY!!!!

What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

[Insert anti-joke here]

What does it take to play in the WNBA? Nothing....

Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

Why did the old man cry? Because he had just witnessed his wife die.

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

WHATS A CRUM AND LIVES IN A SLUM ?? A BOY CALLED KEVIN CRUMMY

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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