We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

How did the little boy fall off his bycicle? Prior to this incident, a psychopathetic killer murdered his family. Therefore, to escape the killer, the boy got onto his bycicle in hopes of manuvering away from the threat. Since it was nighttime he did not notice the fault in the asphalt.( No ryhme intendid.) From flipping over his handlebars, he fell unconcious. Upon the killer spotting the boy, he sliced his head off and left the scene to not be spotted by police.

Q. What's pink and fluffy A. Pink fluff Q. What's blue and fluffy A. Blue fluff

What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

there are three types of people in this world, those who can't count, and those who can. STFU, you corny loser

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

Why are there no Jews in hell? Because Hitler is there,

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...