knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What has feet, but no legs? An alien.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from a Black family reunion.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

i man walks into a bar, he is found dead two days later with severe head trauma.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

thumb_up thumb_down -25

you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops