When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

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You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

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how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

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Religion.

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A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

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Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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