What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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A house comes around the corner.

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...................__ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( BroFist

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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a ginger named corey walks into a bad and gets pistol whipped after raping his classmate

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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Why is Tommy dead? Because he died.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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why was the girl raped? she left the kitchen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops