How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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what's white and bumpy? Milk. But it's not bumpy.

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How do you get a mexican to do the yard work faster? Offer him a 5% bonus.

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What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

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What happed to the kid who survived cancer? He got hit by a plain.

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Two penguins sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap." The other says, "What do you think I am, a clock!?!?"

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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Why couldn't the girl find a date to the prom? Because she was really, really ugly.

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What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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Q: How pregnancy test is performed in Somalia?! A: Shove a piece of bread between the legs of the women and if the bread is bitten when you take it out, she is pregnant!

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welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

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did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

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Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

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Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

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Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

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what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

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Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

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Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

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A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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