A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The priest leaves because they don't have wine.

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I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

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A priest, a rabbi, and an iman all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke? Muslims don't drink beer."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Police officer Police officer who? Police officer your whole family died in a car wreck last night.

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Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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knock knock who's there Bob oh hi, come in

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Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

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How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

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what is black and white and read all over? A penguin in a blender

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Knock Knock. Who's There? The Landlord. Your rent's late.

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what did the asian say to the other asian "where both asian"

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

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how do you tell the difference between a jew and a muslim? you ask them what their religion is.

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Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

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Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

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Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes? A: A whine cellar.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not suzie!!

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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A black person dies.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? its a refridgerator Why did the third monkey jump out of the tree It thought it was a game

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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