A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

How many dead babies can you fit in a telephone booth? Mmm, strange question for my HSC maths exam...

Q: What did one muffin say to another? A: Nothing. Muffins don't talk, you idiot.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was very scary.

a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

Whats worse than seeing a child with autism? Seeing a child doin' serious damage in a mosh pit

How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

Excuse me, do you have any gnats? Yes, plenty. Thank you

How do you stop the London riots? - You employ a a highly effective police tactic to diffuse the crisis as quickly as possible.

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

%3c%2fa%3e%3c%2fh3%3e alert("The Game."); %3cScR%69pt%2ffoo%3eev%61l%28%27ale%27+%27ert%28%29%27%29;

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

Bob: If two negatives make a positive, what would be an anti-anti-joke? Tim: An anti-joke

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPFTeHEsAS4 You will not be disappointed.

Q: What did the forgetful person say to the other? A:

What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies A live one eating its way out!

Whats the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes to step on trampolines.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...