Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

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What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

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Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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Q:Why did the dwarf shout abuse at the bus driver? A: He had anger issues, and the price of the ticket was quite unreasonable.

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Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

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What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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There was a a round house with no corners.How many corners were there? 100 ,I never said that that it had to be that house.

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An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

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hey guys im gay

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Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

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your mama's so fat... that's it

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Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, I have amnesia.

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What's under the first mate? The second mate.

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What happened to the fish? It drowned

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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"Wow, that was so funny i fell off my dinosaur!" Dinosaurs went extinct in the late Cretaceous period, about 65 million years ago. Commonly believed by scientists across the world to have been caused by an ancient meteor that crashed in the current day Yucatán peninsula in Mexico. Also, even if you were around during the Cretaceous period, i assure you that no dinosaur would let you climb on top of it, let alone ride it while you're not highly terrified because of the sheer danger of the experience. Now unless you are 65 million years old, I highly doubt you laughed so hard that you fell off the dinosaur that you supposedly own.

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What's worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The holoca- *the man hearing the joke then pulls out a desert eagle and shoots the man in the chest before finishing the joke then goes to jail for the rest of his life*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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