Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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''Today is Star Wars day :)'' ''Why's that?'' ''guess'' ''I don't know :/'' ''It's May the 4th!'' ''And?'' ''May the 4th be with you :p''

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Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

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What do you call a black fire-fighter? A hero.

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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When is the only time you see a Mexican and Black person driving together ? When they feel like it .

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Roses are red, violets are red. Aaaaaahh! My garden's on fire!

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Are you gay. No. Ok.

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A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

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Hey man. what? squidbillies.

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womens rights

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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Whats green and has wings? grass, I lied about the wings.

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What's the new green? Green

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

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Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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