What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

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What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Steve Jobs is alive.

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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