why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

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Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

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Committing Suicide #YOLO

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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Why did the audience leave disappointed? Low budget and poor directing.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

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So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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9/11

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What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

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Knock Knock. What's up? Oh, nothing much, you? Yeah, you know, same old, same old. Cool.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer and the other is a watermelon.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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