Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

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Q: What does a baby look like in a microwave? A: I don't know, I don't masturbate with my eyes open.

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What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

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What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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what did obama say when he lost his dog ? where the hell is my presidential dog !

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Why did the black man vote for Obama in the presidential election? Every person over the age of 21 has an open opinion to vote for the person of their choice to run as president for a 4-year term.

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the farmer that was trying to kill it.

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Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

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What did the blade of grass say to the other blade of grass? Nothing, as grass does not have the capability of speaking and does not have a brain, all it has is a complex life system where it feeds off water. If it were to say anything though, it would say, "Hey! We're both blades of grass!"

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DAAAAAAAAMN! I AM BEHIND THE SQUARE WHEEL AGAIN! AND THAT SHIT IS POINTY! PRETENDING TO CARE IS SUCH A HASSLE! Anyway, I hope you know I was joking (otherwise you would totally be,not as smart as I thought) but yeah lets see, I am the fourth most pointless MAN, after "The square wheel", "My wife" (:)) I guess some guy just married the wrong wife huh?) And the the fucking wheel is a billion times more manly than Justin Bible or whatever you called that... Thing, and that wheel is made from a female tree! What? HAVE THE LAST COMMENT? I DO NOT GET HAVE! I GET TAKE BY FORCE! Well as far as comments and go, and sex of course.

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Sorry, I need to take care of business up here, it is for the best that we do not communicate for a while, suspicions are going to be flaring up all over the place You better keep your head low, the place with the code-name "The Kings Throne" was under attack, but as you might know, its not what it used to be, you should all leave Point Zero in 3-4 hours when the dust has settled. Personally I suspect it is someone from the past, yes rivals, but according to the information nobody that knows who "The Nero" is, so as you can already tell, you and I are in equal danger until this is resolved. I promise to call you someday

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Why did the chicken cross the road It was being dragged to the other side by fox It's the way of life _._._

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why did miles cross the road? Because hes gay

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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