A devout Christian dies– Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Homosexuals aren't allowed in.

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Uh... You know them N words... When they come crashing into the neiborhood the neiborhood quality drops and gets totally destroyed youknow what im sayan? Uh yeah sure totally... Then you know they spread around smell up dirty and toxicify the whole area, they become so fat and loud and like take everything away from you. Yeah HEIL KKK!! WUUT? I was talking Aboot them Nukular warheds! You you... SOMETHING! Hey! Dont get offensive man, sorry I was just KIDDING!... yeah... KIDDIIING!

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen property that you should return immediately because the consequences of shop-lifting can prevent you from getting a good job and might land you in prison.

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A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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One time there was a girl in a wheelchair and she couldn't walk.

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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Q- what's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A- you take of your shoes to jump on a trampoline

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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what's funnier than the holocaust. If it happened again.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Rocky was chasing him

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Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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A rapist and a little child walk through a dark forest. The little child says: "It's scary here." Rapist answers: "Tell me about, I gotta go back alone through here."

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Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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What is the biggest killer in America? Death.

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Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops