Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

Ehh

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

why did every one care when i killed my self they didn't

Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

what did michael jackson do when i swore at him? nothing he's dead

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a convicted cannibalistic rapist.

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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