Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

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I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

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cops:knock- knock person: who's there? cops: the cops person: the cops who cops: we found the body #Casey Anthony

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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That's funnier than a zebra climbing the Eiffel tower with Bill Clinton on the 4th night of quanza

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My friend just phoned me from the Boston marathon. He was being taken to the hospital due to being injured by the explosions and had to have his leg amputated.

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Vagina (Note: If you are gay just move on by.)

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What did Timmy want for Christmas? Parents.

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Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

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Manchester City

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Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

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A termite walks intio a bar, looks the lovely timber bar up and down, and wonders out loud..."where's the bar tender?"

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

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Why does life hand you lemons? Because it sucks enough, so it wants you to have some.

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Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

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TWO PADDIES PASS A PUB

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Why was the boy mentally retarded? Because his mother was a tree

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What happened to the old lady with a hat? She fell down

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

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A frog goes to a lake. he meets a photographer , the frog ask him ( can you take a picture of me? he says: sure ...say cheese.... then the frog said :....yogurt

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarter ever (this isn't a joke just a true statement)

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what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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