whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

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What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

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Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

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A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

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An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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What happed to the kid who survived cancer? He got hit by a plain.

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Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

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What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane a pilot

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

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How many nipples are on a raccoon ? I don't raccoono

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What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

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Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

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What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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I? Everett

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What do you call a Icelandic man? A guy who lives in a snowhouse with a elevator

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Why couldn't the black man support his family? He was the youngest child of 3 and already had a caring and supporting mother and father.

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What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

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Whats worse then a rainy day? Rape.

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops