Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

Why was the cat in the bag? Because it's owner was abusive and put it in there.

Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

How do you like them apples I dont like aplles

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

A boy kills DEER & cooks it & doesn't tell friends what it is. He gives a clue "Its what my girlfriend calls Me!..

Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

A Bull walks into a bar. it killed three people by the fact it was a Bull

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp

Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

Lol, okay you have made Nero of the clan of the Moralians the mighty laugh and go aww... Seriously, first of all, WHAT THE FUCK IS NAUSEUS? Secondly, okay its Ridge Racer, close enough, aww, seriously that sounds like the cutest thing, I mean did you bleed? DID YOU HARM YOURSELF! DELIGHTFUL... Moral: Seriously though, seeing you tilt over while playing a racing game, kinda cute, just put a pillow there next time you know just saying, because I play videogames, I cant go sexytime for hours without pumping some ADRENALINE INTO MY MIGHTY ROD OF STONEFLESH!

What did the fish want to drink? Charlie Brown

What do you call a black man a asian man and a mexican man? 3 people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...