What does two plus two equal? 4

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What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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Why couldn't Billy the bird fly? He was an ostrich, ostriches can't fly.

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A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

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Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the paralympics? Walking.

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Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

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The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? neh

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Death by kayak

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What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

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Q. What's pink and fluffy A. Pink fluff Q. What's blue and fluffy A. Blue fluff

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

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Whats the difference between a phone and a mexican? You can't dial a mexican.

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What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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