How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

What happened to George's pet rock? It ran away.

Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

What is life? Paul.

how do you make a boy cry you cut out his eyes

What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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