Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

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woman's rights

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this website is a bad joke

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Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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What do grass and deer have in common? They're both green I lied about the deer

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile

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"Smithers, I'm home!" "What, already?" "Yes."

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why did they bury bin laden at sea? because he died

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How do you know if elephants are watching a movie? If a Volkswagen Beetle is parked outside the movie house.

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

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what's worse then a blowjob?

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Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

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Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

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A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

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A man used a ruler to measure his foot, it was size 11

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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Q:Whats a similarity between your mom and your dad? A:They both hate you -Ryan V

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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