Why did the one friend hate the other friend? Because the one friend didnt do a map for social studies he should've done and skipped school for that class and when he came back, the other friend told the social studies teacher he was here and he had to turn in an unfinished poster and now he is a crybaby bitch about it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the Frog say to the other Frog? Nothing they can't speak

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's hard when you eat a vegetable? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chicken is a funny word, and the road is a plot device.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A woman is shopping at a grocery store. She picks up a half gallon of skim milk, 2 loaves of wheat bread, one dozen organic eggs, and some carrots. She goes to the checkout line. "You must be single." the clerk says. Amazed at the flattering insight of the clerk, the woman says, "Yes I am. How could you tell?". "Because you're ugly".

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

"CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!" -Spongebob

thumb_up thumb_down -14

An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you stop a bus? You don't, and Regina George didn't either.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what's worse than the holocaust the man who thought of it

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

The Ohio State Buckeyes

thumb_up thumb_down -14

your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was Timmy sore? He'd been playing with his cornhole along with his friends all day!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops