Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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Q: What's black and white and rape kids? A: Pandas, I lied about the rape.

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So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

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Q: What's worse than school? A:Your mum dying

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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What do you call a man with cheese on his face? His name is David.

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A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ( The chicken says) I dream of a world where a chicken can cross the road without having morals questioned.

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What is the difference between a painting and Jesus? It only takes one nail to put up a painting

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Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

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Your mom is so old she died

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what is red white and blue? the french flag

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pull my finger (farts)

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Why did the black man jump out of the plane? He was going on a parachute dive with his friend.

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

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What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

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Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on their painting skills.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops