Why did the schizophrenic chicken cross the road? He had to go to the clinic, the poor dear.

What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

what did the girls scream when they were being stalked? skydragon

knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

A pope meets another one

How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

Roses are red violets are blue vodka cost less than dinner for two

What does a baby sound like being cooked in the microwave. I don't know I was to busy masterbating.

Okay.

the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

Nope, but you know those like little stop motion things with clay figures? Plompsters or something?

Boy, is it hot this summer! How hot is it?! So hot that many people have died as a result!... Drink plenty of water.

How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

What did the Jewish kid get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

Roses are red violets are blue ice-cream is yummy can I eat you

Charlie Sheen is winning

I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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