Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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A man comes home to his wife sleeping with their neighbor. This lead to their divorce four months later.

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u know whats a crime? rape

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Q: Why'd the guy have to fart? A: There was a buildup of methane gas in his colon.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

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Why was the girl sad? Because she was, you idiot!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

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Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

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a father listens to his son while he was on the computer. he heard "BABBY BABBY OHHHHH" and busted in He was releaved to find him masterbating to porn because he thought it was Justin Beiber

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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h

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When do doctors make house calls? When you're sick.

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what is black and white and red all over? a group of people of mixed races playing paintball.

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What's a ghost's favorite color? Usually whatever their favorite color was in life.

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What's wrong with you? I have no idea.

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What did the raisin say to the toaster? Nothing. The raisin lacks a central nervous system, and the toaster is an inanimate object.

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what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

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Your mamas so fat, that any level of physical exercise is strenuous, but also mentally challenging, as she feels that there is a negative astigmatism attached to sweaty, red-faced overweight individuals trying to burn those pounds. This in turn makes her ashamed of the gastronomically decadent life she once lived, and so she doesn't have the confidence to try and reverse the damage she did during those insecure teenage years, instead comforting herself with the sugary, fatty bane of her life. She therefore lives in a vicious circle, angry at herself and the society that won't accept her. But remaining incredibly, repulsively fat.

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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