There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Oh, And one of them has a penis.

Neither have I, nobody knew him.

What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

Guess what! What? huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu

roses are red violets are microwaves i have amnesia what ma name iiizzz 'SHAWTAY

There's two muffins in an oven, the first muffin says "Woah, it's really hot in here!". The second muffin says "Oh my God! A talking muffin!"

"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

Q: What's worse than being stung by a bee A: The Rwandan Genocide

cchina is communist the USA isnt WHY?

roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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