u know whats a crime? rape

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A duplicate joke on anti-joke.com in an attempt to get thumbs up. Sad, sad people...

What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

whats brown and booky a book.

What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

He who laughs last...is not a laughing owl because they're extinct.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Q: Why'd the guy have to fart? A: There was a buildup of methane gas in his colon.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

Ever heard nobobys perfect well ill name my kid nobody therefore he will perfect

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

A man comes home to his wife sleeping with their neighbor. This lead to their divorce four months later.

hi, my name is zack, i have a boner from the girl to my right(;

why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

What's a ghost's favorite color? Usually whatever their favorite color was in life.

why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

When do doctors make house calls? When you're sick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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