What type of party do you throw when your fat? A baby shower.

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Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? They do, they just choose not to compete certain years.

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Roses are Brown Violets are Brown Whos been shitting on my garden??

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

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I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

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DUH DUH DUH DRAMATIC HAMSTER

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whats black white and red all over an abused child

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No Oh... well he hasn't either

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Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, the orphanage did not have sufficient funds to give everyone a present because they did not want to how favoritism because the orphans are already sad enough and te orphanage does not want the orphans killing them selves

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? Blue.

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There were two mufins in an oven. They did not say anything because muffins are incapable of speech.

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An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

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What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

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Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

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What do a squirrel and a cigarette have in common? -They are both perfectly harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

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what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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