what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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a chinese man pays the full price

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what do you do if you see a black man covered in hot greece on the floor of the bus shelter? call an ambulance...

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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lets bomb africa

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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what did Charlie Sheen say after he won a game of chess? I just won a game of chess!

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When The bus came by Jimmy went bye-bye

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Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

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Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

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mitchell palmer sucks

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What did the ghost say when it stubbed its toe? Ow

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

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why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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How can a hobo become rich? It can't. It died from food poisoning from eating food out of the trash.

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Ok everyone, you know that kid that after his joke he'll put louis on the bottom because that's his name? He sucks at joke telling and if you see any of his jokes, DISLIKE THEM!

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Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

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A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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