Alan: My Grandfather was in the SS and has a leather jacket made jews he killed. Me: Really? Alan: No, i'm korean. My grandfather wouldnt be allowed into the SS.

What do you get if you cross a centipede with a millipede? I don't know but it sure has a lot of legs

What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

Jennifer walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender's name was Steven. His friend's sister who was my cousin's ex wife has the same name as the girl Jennifer. That's what I heard.

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

What do you call a person with an axe stuck to his head? What's your name?

who is really lanky? james cornish

How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

Why was the blonde staring at a container of orange juice? She wanted to make sure that it did not contain any pulp.

Ring Ring Hello? Click

A Fat Kenyan

I guess we will have to see, if I where to one day use my ways of thinking with the intention to become the most corrupt politician of them all, do you think I would succeed?

Why did the girl fall out of the tree? Because she had no arms

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This poem is getting old, I like cookies.

Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

Why was George Washington buried in Virginia? Because he was dead.

Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

A lepord can carry two times its weight into a tree, i dont have a joke for this yet but youll leave here learning something.

What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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