What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Do you know what lmnop is? No. A group of five consecutive letters.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

how many members of the australian greens party does it take to write legislation? none, it's already been done for them by Karl Marx

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's worse than rain on your birthday? Dying

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many people does it take to paint an elementary school red? 27.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Its alright for you to act like a bitch but its not allright for me to call u one

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Y did the first squarl fall out of the tree? It died Y did the 2nd squarl fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Y did the 3rd squarl fall out of the tree? Peer presure. Why did bobby fall off his bike? He got hit by 3 squarls Y did bobby die? He got run over by a truck:)

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like ass, And no one loves you!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

how to turn invisable. eat yourself

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did Little Johny get for Christmas?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats in your pants, might get caught in your zipper and you may hold it all day. your pocket.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops