I like my coffee the way I like Christina Aguilera - I don't.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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Lololol

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A stripper walks into a bar. She works there.

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What do you call a boy with no arm and no legs in a fire? Screwed.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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There once was a boy walking over a railroad track. He got hit by a train. He died.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm a bitch and so are u????????

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

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Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

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What do you get when you mix a donkey with a bungee cord? My bouncy ass

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Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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What did michael say to sam? (pedo face) YEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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roses are red violets are blue me n' friends guna rape you trolololoLOLOLOlololOLLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLO01010101010111 666

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What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

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Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

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But who would want to sell us out and why?

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Mets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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