How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

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Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

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what word starts with the letter N and ends with the letter R that you never wanna call a black person? Neighbor

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

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What did the man say when he put his genitals in a blender? Argggghhh!

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Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

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I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How do you get a one-armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder.

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A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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What did one Dentist say to the other? You are fat.

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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Jay Z: a guy eats a gluten free pickle flavored cupcake, what happened? Will ferell: no one knows what it means! It's provocative!!

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Katniss: Don't worry Prim, your not getting picked for the reaping this year! Effie: First Tribute, Primrose Everden! Katniss: Oh sh*t.

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Q: Did you hear that Hollywood actress got stabbed last night? A: Really? Which one? Q: Reese.. um wither.. withersomething A: Witherspoon? Q: Yes. Her. She's in a critical condition.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Why did jenny fall off the swing? ...Cause she has no arms Knock, Knock Who's there? not jenny

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Q. Why dont people like rian mcreesh ? A. Because he smells bad and gives off a creepy vibe ...

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How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

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What's 2+2? Fish

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A guy walks up to a midget and he says: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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