My Nan, that is all.

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Your mom came to my house last night. We played chess.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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your momma is so poor that she is on welfare.

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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knock knock go away

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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Knock Knock Who did that?

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

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How many bears does it take to screw in a light bulb? None; it’s a fairly menial task requiring little more than a single human hand. Requisitioning any number of bears for the effort would be an extremely dangerous “Rube Goldberg”-esque solution to simple problem.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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