Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

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Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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Yo mama is so old, that it's becoming apparent that she is most likely developing severe senial dementia

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

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A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops