What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

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Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

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I had a really great joke to tell you!

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What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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What's long and black? A long and black object.

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There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

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What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

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Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

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Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

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What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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What did the kid with turrets say? Many swear words but he can not be blamed for this because he has a disease that make him unable to control many of the things he says.

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I used to be an adventurer like you. But then I retired and started a family.

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How do you stop a black kid from jumping around in your bedroom? Chuck him out of the house.

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haha

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

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how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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why did the guy throw his clock out the window? because he wanted to see a clock fall out the window

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What do you call a black man driving a helicopter? Blackhawk down

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Freckles and Spot

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops