sit in the dark for about 4 or 5 hours covered in Vaseline with a huge dildo inside of your arse

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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what do call a car full of people on the side of the road? a cool explosion waiting to happen

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Then none of us want to be right.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

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A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

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What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

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Why did the girl have an abortion? Because she wanted a burger.

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This one time, at band camp, I played the trumpet.

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"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

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Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

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A lot eh?

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What is black and white and red all over? I don't know. I was hoping you did.

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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it's weird how Jesus came out of the cave on the same day as Easter

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What happened to to dyslexic giraffe that tripped over a brick. It got back up.

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

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What do you call a bird with a broken wing? A bird with a broken wing.

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Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

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What's black and white and red all over? A domestically abused bi-racial woman.

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Why did the duck eat the fish? It needed protein.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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