rawrrrrrrrrrrr

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The UPS guy dumb ass

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Q: What did the cat say to the dog? A: I hate you, alot

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What's green, three feet tall, and can live forever? Definitely not Julie Andrews.

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Why did Alex fall off the swing? he had no arms

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat whore.

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?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

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Honk if you're Amish!

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Why was the black child found dead in water? He was raped and thrown into a river.

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What does a Barbie Doll and Britney Spears have in common? They're both 100 percent plastic.

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Q. What's worse than 9/11? A. That one shark jumping episode of Happy Days.

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Ten years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash ... now we have no Jobs, no Hope and no Cash.

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Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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What do you call nuts on a wall? Walnuts. What do you call nuts on your chest? Chestnuts. What do you call nuts on your chin My dick in your mouth.

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What is the difference between a rabbit and a stick? One lives and one not.

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Whats blue and flufft Answer: Blue Fluff

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why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got run over

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Nah Nero, nothing wrong here, I mean I am down to earth, you made me realize that, and sincerely you are my best friend, I mean I hang out with geeks all day, and yeah I might be a bit nerdy or even geeky myself, but not like this, I want to be more like you, spend time with you, not playing dungeon and dragons telling myself I am some warrior princess... I thought playing that crap was gonna get funnier but thats not true the least. What I am trying to say is that I look up to you, what you achieved, and still do, while if you look at me, I am literally several grades below you, so yeah, you are looking down at me. And yeah, I might be falling in love with you to be honest, but I know you have a wife and I am the jealous insecure kind, so I would not want to share you with anyone in fear of losing you if you where my husband, but I dont love you for what I want you to be, I love you for who you are. And yeah I know it must be awkward hearing me type my heart out here, but if you want to know me for who I truly am, as sincere as you are, you deserve it. And no, you are not blunt, you are what people would call "honest to a fault", and I adore that side of you, I mean if I want to hear what people think they want me to hear, I ask anyone else, but you, you are different, you are honest to death, and that makes me feel safe and trust you when you say things, I mean you are a free spirit, if you thought I was ugly you would have told me, and that would have been okay, if it where you actually. So I am sorry if I sound weird or desperate or something, its just whats inside of me right now.

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it was dark outside so u know what i did....went to sleep

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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