Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

what's funnier than the holocaust. If it happened again.

Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

I have two friends, Jeffrey and Barbara. You might think that Jeffrey likes sports and beer, and that Barbara likes knitting and cooking. But you'd be wrong, Barbara is dead.

Knock Knock Who's there? The holocaust

Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

How is a fat girl like a tiny motorcycle? She isn't, and you should be ashamed of yourself for even thinking how she might be.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled it up, slightly spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

Why are Pirates called Pirates? Because the word originates from the term Pirata which means 'sea attacker' in Latin.

What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

What's black, hairy, and full of hate? Hitler's moustache.

When is a car not a car? When it's scrapped and turned into license plates.

Micheal jackson had half a pie, Fred had the other half of the pie, They both shared a pie.

You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

my grandpa has the heart of a lion, and a permanent ban to the zoo.

How did the Jew survive the Holocaust? Trick question he didn't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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