Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

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What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

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What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

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Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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A pair of brothers walked into a bar. It was where the wake was being held from their mother's funeral.

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What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

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The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

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I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

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Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

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chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

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Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -I do not believe chickens like being questioned of their motives. We should leave them alone.

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

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what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

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stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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So this chat, the talk on the phone was all a ruse?

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Q: What do you call a half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building? A: A half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building.

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Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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