what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

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Q. What do cows and grass have in common? A. They both moo, except for grass ????????????

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Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

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Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

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Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

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Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

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a mexican, a asian and a black guy are in a car whos driving? your mom

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the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

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How does a boy with no arms or legs cross the street? He doesn't

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Knock knock! who's there? Doctor Doctor who? No, this is your actual doctor, you have cancer.

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Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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