Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

What did chad do when he found the grape? He ate it.

Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

Why was the man wearing all white? He was a part of the Ku Klux Kan.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

How did the hairless cat braid its hair? It didn't, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs.

What do you call Anne Franks life? A big game of hide and go seek.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the next joke.

How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

What's worse than blowing out 1 lightbulb Blowing out 2 lightbulbs

roses are red, violets are blue, penis

A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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