Your moms so ugly, that when i took her out to eat for dinner we built an everlasting relationship. Thats why you call me dad.

Someone told me once, but i had terrible memory so I had them tell me again.

Q: Why are Dino-Nuggets so good? A: Because they are nuggets in the shape of dinosaurs.

Why isnt Gemma a Surfboarder? .. Because She was a Stillborn. Why isn't Kate a Ballerina? Because She's paralysed. Why isnt Tommy an Olympic High Jumper? Because He's a dwarf.

Why did the black man get stuck to the ceiling? Because he was spiderman.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a beanch can support a family

**** *** *** ****** *** ** *** ***? ***** I bet you wish you could read that joke. It was **** hilarious.

What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

A bartender walks up to a church and a synagogue

Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy jump off a bridge. Who hits the ground first? It doesn't matter. They are all going to die.

you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

Why was the black man kicked out of the restaurant? Blatant racism was still very prevalent at that time and place.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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