why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

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Why did Sally fall off her swing? -she had no arms knock knock whos there not Sally

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A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

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What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

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why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

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Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

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How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

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So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

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Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

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What do you say to a jew with blood on his leg? Are you okay?

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"Have you seen the food African kids eat?" "No.." "NEITHER HAVE THEY!!"

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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What's the cure of cancer? Death.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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what did the black guy ge for christmas? a speeding ticket

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops