Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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How many dead babies can you fit in my truck? Thirty-seven and a half;)

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Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

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Why couldn't the baker get a new car? Because he lived in a recession and nobody was buying his cakes.

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What Do you say to an atheist after he sneezes? Bless you. Its just polite

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If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "I'm Japanese". The guy at the counter says "What a coincidence! I am Japanese too." He gets seated and the guy next to him says, "I'm Japanese too." The bar is in Japan.

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What can a pizza do that a Jew can't? Pizzas can't do anything, so the answers are infinite.

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What did the dubstep say? Wub.

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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What happens if you shoot a chicken? It dies.

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Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

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Yo mama's so fat that after her enima, she looked skinny and rather nice

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Knock Knock Whos there? Me. I am a psycopathic heroin addict, and i came to your house to violently rape you and kill your whole family. I dont have a family. Oh.

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What did the monk give to the cancer patient? His love and reassurance.

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What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

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Two friends were running late for their school gathering. As they arrived the train station, one friend said 'Quick, we need to catch the train!' The other replied, 'Can't we just get in it?'

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 6 being the highest how confused are you?

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Knock Knock Who's there A serial rapist

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When life throws knives at you, run away.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when i jump on a trampoline.

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Guy1: Hey! Do you want to hear a potassium joke? Guy2: Sure! Guy1: K

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops