What's Funny and has two Wheels A kids falling off his bike

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How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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420

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

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What did hitler get for christmas??? Roughly 3 million dead jews in the ashtray

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What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A black man is setting up contingency measures of protection in his personal place of residence when all of a sudden, several warning alarms sound and a few specialized people with red "combating" devices who were alerted by the blatant scenerio unfolding before them were moving quickly in order to match previously stipulated criteria of value. The black man and his family were partaking in a monthly fire drill unfolding in their own house since they were extremely responsible, law-abiding citizens of the city they were located in that required various kinds ofl saftey precautions to be taken so to mitigate the serious chance that people might be hurt by preventable, residential distasters.

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What did the man with cancer say when he got hit in the face with a crowbar? "Ow."

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what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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