A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

What did the chicken say to the.... nevermind

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

A woman buys a man a Valentine's Day present.

Why did the chiken cross the road? To bite a rubarb stick.

what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

what's Mexicans favourite sport? Cross country.

This joke is not funny, So don't read it.

Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

dylan wishes he could come up with funny jokes. but that is impossible for a man trying to bat with a .5inch ****

If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

what do u call a black persons face? a black persons face...

Corn Muffins

what did the astronaut say to the rocket scientist? hi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...