A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

A jew enters a mall.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

Q: Playstation 4 or Xbox One? A: Both of them are specialized desktop computers used to play video games. It makes no sense to argue or attempt to make any distinction, as they are the exact same thing.

If you were on an island with one wish what would you wish for? To get off the island

How did Bob survive the plane crash? He didn't

ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

What did Bambi say to her mother when her mother was killed? Nothing. Bambi's a deer. Duh.

Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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